Kids can be such A**holes

So I just got finished subbing today... well a few hours ago, I will admit I came home and had a glass of wine... These kids were ruthless, and I had no idea how to deal. I let all my diversity and developmental training go out the window and practiced a little yoga/meditation training. I was able to make an hour and a half go by rather quickly with a little text messaging in between. I have always appreciated the observation of subbing in high school. On one level it brings you back, puts you in the place of teachers and reminds you of your youth, on a totally different level it makes you wonder if the end of humanity is nearing. I actually was handed a love note by a student today, another student was shocked by the fact that I was from the valley. I am reminded of the fact that I am the minority down here, that to some I am no longer the hippy Austin loving person with a counseling degree and diversity training under my belt. That I used to utter the words can't we all just get along until I realized that we have our own struggles and differences that make us wonderful. To a large population of Harlingen High School I am the blue eyed enemy. These students have lived lives that far outreach mine, they have children and night jobs, they are confused that I have neither and that I lived down here moved away and for some reason moved back with no husband or child tugging at my skirt. I was disappointed in myself, dissapointed in the fact that I believe in the Edward James Olmos movie lines, I have watched Stand and Deliver and many other moves that deal with adversity and overcoming that very thing, but I was at a loss today. I gave up I figured that I could not be the one to make a difference in one day. At one point I considered, throwing away their work and telling them all about myself, look at me I am cool... I promise... but then figured that was a waste as well... I am yet to discover how to make a difference... I do appreciate the difference. Occasionally I answer them in Spanish which is my little way of stirring thing up. But never anything as easy as Buenos Dias, I always throw a really difficult saying to really keep them guessing. I have noticed the difference between my day (late 80's early 90's) and the modern day cholo (lowrider) He no longer wears a wife beater with a flannel shirt over it with only the one top button buttoned, no stacy shoes (AKA shiny cockroach killer shoes) and the hair net is out. The bling is in, the CZ earrings in both ears and the baggy pants. Many of you will be happy to know that extremely white sneakers are still in fashion, laces tied being optional. I would have never known this bit of information if I had not taken on this immersion therapy I call substitute teaching at my former high school. Sometimes I sit in total awe. One student said to me today... Hey miss you are just sitting there staring off into space, and I replied, well what do you want me to do if I try and show any bit of authority you will take it as a challenge and be a jerk back and I'm really not in the mood today. That was after he asked me if these were my real eyes. Oh and yes you can buy colored contacts in the pharmacies in Mexico for reduced prices if you are interested...

Other than that I have been down to the beach, gotten a tan in January, been on a few dates, one with a guy from Michigan and another with a guy from high school. Crazy, I now believe that everyone at some point of their life should move back to where they came from and enjoy the moment. I find myself in utter and complete shock every now and then, loving it and finding refuge in my home, my sanctuary. I have a birthday party/house warming this weekend, a night out with friend at the only semi-cool bar in town and another day of substitute teaching. Say a prayer for me tonight, for tomorrow I return to the hallowed halls of HHS.... Cardinal Spirit Never Dies!